Inspire Me (January 2005)

True stories, quotes and information on inspiration, leadership and kindness to provide hope and direction in your life.

Story for the Month By Harald Anderson

What is it that you really want in your life?

Money? Status? Success? A Prosperous Business? A Loving Relationship?

Now let me ask you a super blunt question: Why don't you have it yet?

A few months ago I attended a seminar. One of the speakers began his presentation with what I initially considered a very confrontational remark. He paused very dramatically and bellowed… "What lies do you keep telling yourself?" Although the room fell deafly silent, we all knew
that his question truly touched a nerve. That question has echoed in the hollows of my mind ever since.

"What lies do you keep telling yourself?"

"You're calling me a liar?" "All the lies?" "How much time do you have?" "That's not a lie, that's the truth!" The responses that were firing up to that question were racing through my mind at the speed of light.

In Life We Can Have Results or Reasons. If you are not getting the results you want, your reasons are the lies that you keep telling yourself. You can try to argue with that statement but its kind of like wrestling with the wind, it will keep you real busy but you really won't get anywhere. Lies create the idea that we are powerless to make things any different than the way they are.

I hate to admit it but we are all liars. We love our reasons and will go to extreme lengths to hold onto them. After all, our reasons are our stories, which define us. Those experiences "made us who we are today!" It's just the way things are……..

Results or reasons. Which do you have more of? If you answered reasons, its time to analyze the lies. I speak from experience. I spent the first thirty years of my life studying what I should believe in. Studied all the great reasons. Read all the great philosophers, not once did anybody ask me….."What is it that you want to experience with all these ideas?" So I got a little top heavy on reasons and a little short on results.

The problem with having so many reasons is that eventually these reasons create a logic of limitations. They are like a virus that creates "a story" that runs in the background of your minds hard drive. Whenever we see something that we want to create, the first thing we bump into is
these beliefs (reasons) that have shaped our experience thus far. And so the battle ensues.

Possibilities vs. Limitations. The Grudge Match.

It's like a counterproductive stealth message has been implanted in your mind, "You never seem to really win at anything, so don't expect much here!" This message brought to you by your sponsor, "limiting lives is what we do!"

We all search for meaning in life. However sometimes life is meaningless. It just "is." The critical moments that shape our lives are when we define our experience and declare…."what this means is (fill in the blank)." If the statement that we make at this crucial moment, in filling in the blank, even mildly disempowers us, we empower the logic of limitations to control our perspective from that moment forward.

Don't believe me? Here are some famous examples for you to try on for size:

Oprah Winfrey was fired from one of her first jobs as a television reporter and told that "She wasn't fit for TV." How do you think she defined that moment? After his first performance on the Grand Ole Opry, Elvis Presley was banned from returning and told, "You ain't going nowhere son!" At that crucial moment do you think the King of Rock created a message of possibility or limitation?

Life just is. Sometimes when we look for meaning we might want to remember that.

What's your story?

Have you ever been fired, rejected, heartbroken, mistreated, insulted? How did you define the moment? I only ask, because that agreement has shaped your reality. Be Careful What You Agree With! The Results Can Be Lethal.

Now what did you say you really wanted in your life?

Listen carefully and you'll hear those reasons whispering their logic of limitations! It's no big deal if you hear the "stories" from time to time. The question is what are you going to do about it?

Mark Twain once commented that "life does not consist, mainly or even largely of facts or happenings. It consists mainly of the stream of thought forever flowing through ones head." Our REASONS create our definitions and create the energy of our life. Change our definitions
and you change your experience. Change your meanings you alter your destiny. Life does not give us what we want. Life gives us whatever we expect. Life just is. The meaning that we attach to the events of our life defines our experience and creates the thoughts that allow us to
create abundance or limitation.

When I was a kid I absolutely loved to read the cartoons and comics in the back of the newspaper. They made me laugh with glee. Now those cartoons were essentially a picture being defined by a clever or witty caption. One day I got the bright idea that I was going to change the captions on those cartoons and see if I could make them funnier. Isn't life the same way? Your pictures are your experiences. Your captions are your beliefs. Do you have the courage to change your own captions? It's your life after all. The only limitation we possess is the idea that there are limitations. Did you write your own captions or did you allow someone else to write them for you?

We all have a huge investment in what we have come to know. However, sometimes what we know has nothing to do with what we need to know to be successful. Sometimes what we know has nothing to do with what we need to know to be happy! To change all of that you need to locate your limiting beliefs and say goodbye to them. Change the captions of your life. Reasons or Results.

Marilyn Voss Savant writes a weekly column for Parade magazine. She is acclaimed as the person with the highest IQ on record. When she was asked by one of her readers about life, she responded with ""Feeling is what you get for thinking the way you do!" True poetry. To that I would simply add, be careful what you agree with it'll mess up your focus.

Consider this for a second: How many beliefs were you born with? How many beliefs do you have today? Along the way you have acquired a lot of baggage that is weighing you down. The problem most of us run into is that we believe in things that are "just not so", but we lead our lives in alignment with those lousy definitions and experiences to make them "so." It might be BELIEF-ECTOMY time.

One of the central tenets of the personal development movement is that we become whatever we focus upon most. Fifty years ago Earl Nightingale published his bestseller "The Strangest Secret" and made us realize that our focus creates our destiny. Web poet, adventurer and philosopher Mike Dooley of www.tut.com has eloquently modernized and improved upon this statement when he states, "Thoughts Become Things. Choose the Good Ones!" Most people don't get what they really want because their focus is fuzzy at best. Do you really know what you are focused on? Before you answer that question too quickly recognize that your focus has been responsible for creating your life up until this point. Your agreements shape your reality…. so be careful what you agree with.

So what is it that you really want? My advice is simple. Be Careful What You Agree With and Then Focus, Focus, Refocus and Refocus some more. And when you think you are through focusing, focus again. You wouldn't drive to your destination fixated on the rear view mirror! Reasons or Results. Be Realistic: Create A Miracle!

Poem for the Month

MOMENTS IN LIFE
By Author Unknown

There are moments in life when you miss someone
so much that you just want to pick them from
your dreams and hug them for real!

When the door of happiness closes, another opens;
but often times we look so long at the
closed door that we don't see the one,
which has been opened for us.

Don't go for looks; they can deceive.
Don't go for wealth; even that fades away.
Go for someone who makes you smile,
because it takes only a smile to
make a dark day seem bright.
Find the one that makes your heart smile.

Dream what you want to dream;
go where you want to go;
be what you want to be,
because you have only one life
and one chance to do all the things
you want to do.

May you have enough happiness to make you sweet,
enough trials to make you strong,
enough sorrow to keep you human and
enough hope to make you happy.

The happiest of people don't necessarily
have the best of everything;
they just make the most of
everything that comes along their way.

The brightest future will always
be based on a forgotten past;
you can't go forward in life until
you let go of your past failures and heartaches.

When you were born, you were crying
and everyone around you was smiling.
Live your life so at the end,
you're the one who is smiling and everyone
around you is crying.

Don't count the years - count the memories...........